| | One letter relates to psychology - mental... | Excerpt length: shorter longer | |
| Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh
(12 October 1883)
... felt exactly the same toward
people.
They said I was out of my mind, but I knew myself that it
was not true, for the very reason that I felt my own disease
deep within me, and tried to remedy it. I exhausted myself with
hopeless, unsuccessful efforts, it is true, but because of that
fixed idea of reaching a normal point of view again, I never
mistook my own desperate doings, worryings and drudgings for my
real innermost self. At least I always felt, “Just let me
do something, be somewhere, and it must redress itself.
I will rise above it, let me keep hold of patience to redress
things.”
I do not believe somebody like ———(?) for
instance - who proved really to be insane - thought that way,
and therefore I repeat, I have often thought those years of
grubbing over, but I do not see how in those circumstances I
could have been different from what I was.
This was the ground which gave way under my feet; think how
miserable anyone... |
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