Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (22 June 1882) ... hand we are superior in some other things. She came to visit me
regularly until the last day, and brought me some smoked beef
and sugar or bread, which I have to do without now, and it
makes me feel very faint. But now I am so sorry that I in turn
cannot go to Leyden to bring her some extras that she might
need, for the food one gets there is not particularly good. It
gives me such a strange feeling not to be able to do anything,
and see the days pass by so idly. Sometimes I think I shall be
able to do this or that, but then weakness gets the better of
me.
I am very glad you were interested in the drawings I sent
you. I worked so hard on them, and on the ones for C. M. also,
those last days when I suffered much more pain and was much
more depressed than since I have been here. For I felt worse
before I went to the hospital, long before.
Now I want to tell you that I've had a letter from Rappard.
Of course I had sent him back the 2.50 guilders at once, and
then...
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (2nd half June 1885) ... has been and always will be so.
One may sleep on straw, eat black bread, well, one will only
be the healthier for it.
I should like to write more, but I repeat, I am not in a
mood for writing, and I wanted to enclose a note for Serret
besides, which you must read also, because I write in it about
what I want to send before long, especially because I want to
show Serret my complete figure studies. Goodbye,
Yours, Vincent
Serret may agree with you that to paint good pictures and to
sell them are two separate things. But it is not at all true.
When at last the public saw Millet, all his work together, then
the public both in Paris and in London was enthusiastic.
And who were the persons that had suppressed and refused
Millet? The art dealers, the so-called
experts.
...
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (28 December 1885) ... continue until all the money has gone. Meanwhile what will be
keeping me going is my breakfast with the people where I live,
and a cup of coffee and some bread in the crêmerie in the
evening. Supplemented, when I can, by a second cup of coffee
and bread in the crêmerie for my supper or else some rye
bread I keep in my trunk. As long as I am painting that is more
than enough, but when my models have left, a feeling of
weakness does come over me.
The models here appeal to me because they're so completely
unlike the models in the country. And more especially because
their character is completely different. And the contrast has
given me some new ideas for the flesh colours in particular.
And though I'm still not satisfied with what I've achieved with
my last head, it does differ from the earlier ones.
I think you value the truth enough for me to speak freely to
you. For much the same reasons that if I paint peasant women I
want them to be peasant...
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (c. 21 April 1888) ... you have got his study of the Negress.
But indeed, it will
do you good to have breakfast. I do it
here myself, and eat two eggs every morning.
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (1 May 1888) ... the better. I want to make sure of that.
You know, if I could only get really strong soup,
it would do me good immediately: it's preposterous, but I never can get what I ask for, even the
simplest things, from these people here. And it's the same everywhere in these little
restaurants.
But it is not so hard to bake potatoes?
Impossible.
Then rice, or macaroni? None left, or else it is messed up
in grease, or else they aren't cooking it today, and they'll
explain that it's tomorrow's dish, there's no room on the
stove, and so on. It's absurd, but that is the real reason my
health is low.
All the same, it cost me positive agony to decide on a
definite step, for I reminded myself that in The Hague and
Nuenen I had tried to take a studio, and how badly it turned
out! But many things have changed since then, and the ground
feels firmer underfoot, so let's get on ahead. Only we have
spent such a lot already on this blasted painting that we must
not forget...
