Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (c. 15-27 April 1882) ... without drawing the necessary studies.
Of course it causes me a great deal of worry and makes my
life far from easy when those whom I thought I could depend on
for sympathy, like Mauve and Tersteeg, become indifferent or
hostile and spiteful. I have not heard anything from Mauve; one
day he is ill, and then again he needs rest, or he is too busy.
How beautiful his picture for the Salon is!
But you understand these things yourself, so enough.
This little drawing also needs a narrow grey mount. You
write that you have moved; I will do my best to make something
for the walls of your new home now and then. I also have a few
good wood engravings you could perhaps use if you like them, as
I have duplicates of some good ones. But you must see and
choose those for yourself when you come this summer.
I have not moved, but I have had an alteration made in my
house, that is, I have had a little bedroom partitioned off in
the attic; now I have more room in the studio, especially...
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (c. 10 October 1882) ... drizzling rain. But it is very beautiful.
But it's on days like
this that one would like to go and see
some friend or would like a friend to come to the house; and
it's on days like this that one has an empty feeling when one
can go nowhere and nobody comes. But it's then that I feel how
much the work means to me, how it gives tone to life, apart
from approval or disapproval; and on days which would otherwise
make one melancholy, one is glad to have a will.
I had a model for a few hours today, a boy with a spade,
hod-carrier by trade , a very intriguing type - flat nose, thick
lips and very coarse, straight hair - yet whenever he does
something, there is grace in the figure, at least style and
-character. I think I shall have some good
models this winter; the owner of the yard has promised to send
me the ones who come to ask for work, which often happens in
the slack season. I am always glad to give them a few sixpences
for an afternoon or morning, for that is just...
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (22 July 1883) ... Adieu,
Yours sincerely, Vincent
In fact, I have no
real friend but you, and when I am in low
spirits, I always think of you. I only wish you were here, that
we might again talk together about moving to the country.
Except for what I told you about, there is nothing the
matter with me, and things are going well - but perhaps I am a
little feverish or something - I feel miserable. I had to pay
money right and left - landlord, paint, baker, grocer,
shoemaker, heaven knows what - and only a little is left But
the worst is that after many such weeks, one feels one's
resistance ebbing, and is overcome by a pervading feeling of
If you can't send anything at once, brother, at all events
try to write me by return of mail if possible. And as to the
future, if there is some danger, tell it straight out,
“homme avisé en vaut deux,” it is better to
know exactly what one has to fight against.
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (24 September 1883) ... here
Do write again soon. I
long to hear from you, for I feel
gloomy, notwithstanding the beautiful scenery. Adieu, with a
Yours sincerely, Vincent
Remember me to Wisselingh when you meet him, and tell him I
Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (1 December 1883) ... very hard up, to use a mild expression. Add to this that particular torture, loneliness, and really you will no longer
be able to imagine me “well off,” either in
the present or the past.
I say loneliness, and not solitude, but that loneliness -
which a painter has to bear, whom everybody in such isolated
areas regards as a lunatic, a murderer, a tramp, etc. etc.
Indeed, this may be a small misery, but it is a sorrow after
all: A feeling of being an outcast - particularly strange and
unpleasant - though the country may be ever so stimulating and
But for the rest I only look upon it as a bad time, which
must be got through, and which one can change but little
oneself, that is to say, in the relations with people whom one
would love to have as models, but cannot get.
Looking back, I see clearly enough now how it came to a
misunderstanding between you and me.