Dear Mother and sister,
Until today I have not been able either to bring myself to
read your letter or to write one, and the doctor not being at
home today, I cannot get the letters and the package you sent
me, but in the meantime I don't want to postpone thanking you
both most heartily. With all my heart I hope that all is well
with you both, and also with Anna and Lies and their
Today I wrote Theo and sent him a number of pictures, some
of which I expect him to send on to you. So you see I have not
been able to work during the most favorable part of spring,
consequently things aren't going too well. But what can a man
do about it? Every change is not a change for the better, but I
am longing to get away from here; what one has to endure here
is hardly bearable.
These last few days I have been working on the picture of a
lawn in the blazing sun with yellow dandelions. among other
things a memory of Brabant, hovels with moss-covered roofs and
beech hedges on an autumn evening with a stormy sky, the sun
setting amid ruddy clouds. Also a turnip field
with women gathering green stuff in the snow.
I have asked Theo to let me have as many of my old drawings
as he has kept.
Do you happen to have any of my old studies and drawings at
home? Though they may not be good in themselves, they may serve
to refresh my memory, and so be the subjects for new work, but
I do not want those you have hanging on the walls, for
instance. I should prefer quick sketches of peasant figures.
But it is not important enough for you to rummage a long time
to find them.
With all my heart I hope you are both well; and before long
I shall write more. Believe me, I often think of you. I embrace
you in thought.
Your loving Vincent
As soon as I heard that my work was having some success, and
read the article in question, I feared at once that I should be
punished for it; this is how things nearly always go in a
painter's life: success is about the worst thing that can
At this time, Vincent was 37 year old
Vincent van Gogh. Letter to His Parents. Written 30 April 1890 in Saint-Rémy. Translated by Mrs. Johanna van Gogh-Bonger, edited by Robert Harrison, number .
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